Blanca DeBree Blog

I am pledging my support to Proposition 1, the ballot question to repeal gay marriage in Maine.  I would also like to join all of my conservative friends in pledging to support Maine both financially and emotionally if they vote Yes on Prop 1.

As a conservative, gay marriage is a hot button issue, more than any other issue out there.  It has been proven time and time again how gay marriage leads to promiscuity, higher divorce rates, and more broken marriages.  By supporting homosexuality, the state is promoting sin and destroying traditional marriage, which has existed for thousands of years.

Of course, the statistics I use to show how gay marriage is causing an increase in divorce rates are from the same group who says the United States has the best health care system in the world, we pay the highest corporate taxes, and there were weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.  But as long as you don’t scrutinize the facts, the argument stands up pretty well.

And the idea that state is promoting sin by supporting gay marriage is based solely on the Bible.  There are a lot of things listed in the Bible as sins.  But let’s choose to ignore these.  We all like shell fish too much to take all the things in the Bible seriously.  And who wants to get stoned for mixing fabrics?  And God knows, if any of us had to pass the virgin test, we’d all be killed on the spot.

Naturally the promise to support Maine’s Yes vote on Prop 1 by spending a family vacation in Maine is a hollow one.  Conservatives don’t go to New England for holiday.  They travel to the Holy Land in Orlando, Florida or visit Branson, Missouri, where they can be assured wholesome, family entertainment, free of sex, violence, and excitement.  So even though none of us on the right will ever make good on our promise to spend time in Vacationland, it is the thought that counts.

And the promise to financially support Maine is nothing more than an unfunded mandate.  None of the marchers in Washington–birthers, tea baggers, Constitutionalists, Libertarians, or Republicans–has a dime to his name right now.  Paying exorbitant premiums and co-pays on health insurance coupled with the expense of magic markers and poster board has left all of us broke and incapable of affording a dictionary, let alone anything from the great state of Maine.

We may pledge to buy lobster, or beer, or funny moose hats, but to tell the truth, we are too busy eating government cheese, going to food pantries, and getting food stamps to have time to buy any food from Maine.  Besides, that would cut into our protests against government handouts.  In between our visits to the Medicare office and our tea parties decrying medical socialism, we have a full schedule and can’t really be bothered with supporting our allies.

And are you really our allies, anyway?  Didn’t you support civil unions before you went all gung ho on the gay marriage thing?  Why should we bother to support you,  after you elected not only one but two of the worst RINO’s in the history of the party?  Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins make a mockery of the Republican party and all that is conservative.

And while we are at it, wasn’t it your Republican governor who signed this gay marriage bill into law in the first place?  I mean if you honestly want to know, I think you were asking for this.  I don’t think our support for Maine can be all that strong in light of these liberals running amok in your state.

Come to think of it, I don’t think you really can count on anything any of us pledge at this point.  I mean look at how we abandoned California after they voted Yes on Prop 8.  The state is now bankrupt, selling their inventory on e-Bay, and closing everything but Arnold Schwarzenneger’s mouth.  If we really had cared about eliminating gay marriage, don’t you think we would have used our vast resources to help bail out the state by spending some Christian dollars in the Golden State?

You know, if you really want to see some financial win from your vote on Prop 1, you probably should vote No.  It’s not like a bunch of fundamentalist Christians are going to be knocking down your door asking to get married next to a stuffed moose.  But gay people will.  I hear they are already planning to come to Maine and spend hundreds of dollars per couple, watching the sunrise, hiking the mountains, and enjoying cheap lobster from a road side stand or gas station.

Some of them will spend thousands of dollars getting married, with or without the stuffed moose.  And of course they will not only bring themselves, but their friends and families to partake in the ceremonies.  The influx from tourism and marriage could equate to millions of dollars at a time when the state is most susceptible to budget cuts.

But I’m sure none of that concerns you.  You would rather put your faith behind a bunch of faithless valueless voters, who will make pie in the sky promises of vacations and purchases to come, which never materialize.  As we forget about Maine by mid November, we will be on to the next state, which has the gall to promote equality.  The Maggie Gallaghers and NOMs will leave behind a spoiled landscape, resembling Woodstock after the concert.

Sure, you will be left high and dry, but you will be left high and dry with the satisfaction that you not only stood up for what was right, but you stood against what was wrong.  Remember, if good people like those who will vote Yes on Prop1 had had their way without the meddling Supreme Court, activist judges, or legislatures, the world would be a much better and holier place today.  And none of us would have to contend with gay marriage, interracial marriage, blacks voting, women voting, or slaves being free.

Remember, equality is gay.

| | | | | |

Tags: Gay Marriage, Maine, Proposition 1, Proposition 8
Posted 25 Sep 2009 by blancadebree in Homos